Medical pickup lines are a great way to make friends and potential dates feel special. They play on our compassion and make us want to help out someone who is in need. However, some of these lines could be problematic if used improperly. In this article, we’ll look at some of the most popular medical pickup lines and how to use them safely and respectfully.
Looking for a little bit of lighthearted fun during your next medical appointment? Check out our collection of medical pickup lines! Whether you’re hoping to make a patient laugh or just relieve some of the tension, these lines are sure to do the trick!
Medical Pick Up Lines
It can be tough to find someone to take care of you when you’re sick, but there are some pretty hilarious medical pickup lines you can use to make your situation a bit more bearable.
- Do you have an inhaler? You took my breath away.
- I hope you passed CPR because you’re taking my breath away.
- Nice antibody. Wanna conjugate?
- Are you a C-reactive protein? Because you have a-cute phase.
- Does this rag smell like chloroform?
- ICU in my dreams.
- Are you Broca’s Aphasia? Because you leave me speechless.
- Playing doctor is for kids…let’s play gynecologist!
- My love for you is so strong it can’t be dialyzed.
- I have my own multi-positional bed.
- Can I take your temperature? You’re looking hot today.
Also Check: Nurse Pick Up Lines
Creative Medical Pick Up Lines
Medical pickup lines can be a little cheesy, but they can also be very clever and witty. If you’re trying to make a good impression on someone who is sick, or just looking to lighten the mood a bit, these are some of the best lines you could use.
- Hey girl, are you a pulmonary embolism? Cause you’re making me breathless..
- You’re the sinoatrial node of my heart. Without you, even a defibrillator won’t save me.
- Do you believe in love at first site, or do I have to walk by again?
- I need a life. Please lower your standards and go out with me.
- Emphysema puffs pink, chronic bronchitis makes you blue, but no COPD makes me as breathless as you.
- “If I had to choose between my health and your beauty, I’d take my health every time.”
- I just want to swab you up and down, then left and right, until we’re both afebrile.
- If I said you had a monoclonal antibody, would you hold it against me?
- Are you my appendix? I have a gut feeling I should take you out.
- “I’m not sure if you’re feeling well, but you look like you could use a good night’s sleep.”
- Are you a nurse? Because you cured my erectile disfunction.
- You make me go from simple squamous to stratified columnar.
- I didn’t plan on specializing, but you seem pretty special to me.
- If you need a love doctor, I have like a medicated degree.
- Are you a doctor? Because you just cured my erectile dysfunction.
- Did you damage my cerebellum? Because I’m falling all over the place for you.
- You must be my coronary artery because you’re wrapped around my heart.
- I might need life alert, because I’ve fallen in love with you and can’t get up.
- Are you a pulmonary embolism? ‘Cause I can’t breathe when I’m around you.
- “I see you’re feeling a bit under the weather. Poor thing! I hope you get better soon.”
- “Looks like we have something in common: we both need to get out of this sickroom ASAP!”
- Do you have a Band-Aid? Because I just scraped my knee falling for you.
- Is that a Laryngoscope handle in your pants or are you just happy to see me?
- If I go into cardiac arrest will you give me mouth to mouth?
Also Check: Pharmacy Pick Up Lines
Trending Medical Pick Up Lines
Medical pickup lines can be a fun way to make a connection with someone you might not otherwise have the opportunity to meet. They can also be a way to break the ice and get to know someone better. Whether you’re a doctor or just someone who is interested in the medical
- If I was an endoplasmic reticulum, how would you want me? smooth or rough?
- In my pursuit of happiness, I found nothing but pain. Hey. Give me some opiates!
- Do you have a favorite med pickup line? Add yours to the list via the comments section!
- Is your name Neosporin, because i’d like to rub you on my body.
- Are you drowning? Because I’m feeling the urge to give you CPR.
- You’d better be a cardiologist, because something about you makes me want to give you my heart.
- You get my heart racing like an epinephrine drip.
- Why is it so hard to study the cardiovascular system? Because the heart is fragile and should always be handled with care.
- Who needs a CPR when I have you?
- You can fill my caudate nucleus with dopamine anytime.
- You raise my dopamine levels.
- Stand a little closer, baby, and I’ll bring palpitations to your liver.
- Did you cut my phrenic nerve? Because baby, you take my breath away.
- The way you talk to me leaves me aphasic.
- Girl, your personality is so magnetic I think our protons are in alignment.
- Did you alter my vestibular apparatus?! Because I keep falling over for you!
- Is that a tumour in your penis or are you just happy to see me.
- You have 206 bones in your body, want one more?
How to Choose Medical Pick Up Lines? Best Guide
If you’re looking for a bit of lighthearted fun when picking up a doctor or nurse, try out some of these medical pickup lines. No matter what your relationship with healthcare professionals may be, they’ll appreciate a little humor in their day.
“I’m not sure if you’re a doctor or a janitor, but I’d like to hire you.”
“Is your specialty surgery? Because I need someone to operate on me.”
“I think I’ve broken my leg. Would you be able to set it for me?”
Medical pickup lines can be a great way to make a first impression on someone you are interested in. They can also be used as icebreakers when meeting new people. If you are looking for some ideas to get started, here are a few that might work well for you:
-I’m a doctor, so I know everything about _____
-You must be tired from all of the testing we did today
-I always wanted to do something special with someone like you – see if I can make that happen